Sacred Moments: How Ritual Enhances My Sex Life and Deepens Connection

I’ve written before about the intentional way I approach my sex life by which I mean that I schedule it in. It’s not spontaneous and there’s a reason for that. First off, I don’t live with the man (or men) with whom I have sex and I like to get my head in a place that is all about pleasure.

I don’t want to be worrying about the washing, or that I haven’t unloaded the dishwasher, or that I have an important meeting the next day for which I need to prepare. The hours I spend with my situationship, which is what I call him, are sacred to me - we both call it our therapy - and we are completely focussed on turning each other on.

Aside from showering, shaving, soft lighting, candles, and music that contributes to rather than detracts from our enjoyment, I like to consider what I’m going to wear. Often times, I end up leaving on a particular item of clothing for the entire time we’re together, because a hint of flesh can be more exciting and sexy than being fully naked. Crotchless knickers, a see-through bra, a silky robe. You get the idea.

I have far too much lingerie, but there are pieces that I come back to because they make me feel desirable and they enhance my assets. Here’s my shopping list: